A found short-short story from this week's South Florida Craigslist. A woman looking for a man:

Who would have known that dating would be so hard? Well it is and specially downhere in South Florida. Everyone has a past and a story and everything else. So here goes the list of things I am looking for. I am gonna get specific cause I can.

1. I want a guy between the ages of 26-33
2. White, at least five feet 10 inches
3. Someone from the south, Texas, Oklahoma, Lousiana, you know somewhere like that.
4. Loves or has dogs.
5 Likes to drink Draft beer
6. Watches football
7. Loves to travel
8. takes care of themselves-not a heavy drinker, smoker.
9. No drugs
10. has a good job that they like
11. Likes that I have a great job and is okay with that.
12. Loves funny stuff, dry humor, sarcastic and loves to laugh.
13. has a great amile and takes care of their teeth.
14. has good friends and close with their family okay with the fact that I am sometimes a handful
16. Loves to be outside and do active things
17. wakes up earily, is a morning person
18. likes kinda being a loner sometimes like me ( we can get wrapped up in our own world)
19. will not hit on my mom
20. will tell me when I am being rediculous
21.likes to watch "The Office"
22. is really lovie dovie after a few drinks.
23. wont get pissy if I smoke after I drink
24. Knows how to grill
25. Will take me to Bali
26. Knows how to dress
27. when he does get me a gift, knows me well enough to get the right one.
28. will teach me how to do stuff I dont know how to do.
29. is a great kisser
30. Wont cheat on me.
31. Will talk when something is wrong and not walk out.
33. wants kids someday...someday later on...
34. has a good last name

35. makes my friends laugh.
36. hates going to the movies
38. is romantic but not cheesey
39. goes commando!
40. likes me alot

So there are a few things I really want. If you have all of these things send me your picture and I will send you mine and we will go from there. I am cute and fun and unliek anyone you have ever met. I am just tired of meeting all the worong ones. I want someone I can stand still with....